The heat is on, it is getting to me. The heat is fatal. Now to think about, last few days have been rather complicated. When there is too much on the plate, you never know where to start and with what, too much to do and just not knowing where to start and with what and when you do start there is that continued feel of all the other that needs to be done. So it all ends up in a fix.
A few days back, a girl came to me crying and opened up her past for me. A very strong willed girl I must say. She and her very good friend were out on a drive, things were fine they were talking, having some beers and discussing life. They stopped at a couple of places had food at a restaurant things were fine. In the evening before dropping her, the guy came close to her kissed her on. It was nice, both felt something very strong. After some days they met and this continued and they got a little more intimate. The guy fell in love with the girl. While the girl still liked him as a friend. Even after thinking a lot the girl wasn’t able to think of him as someone more than a friend. Thinking she would hurt the guy more, she started ignoring him and the guy started thinking that the girl used him. She tried to tell him, make him understand but he wouldn’t listen. I don’t blame him, he loved her. The girl tried to go back to the good friends they were, but things were not the same. Slowly they parted ways. The guy moved on with his life. But the girl still sits there thinking that maybe she used him. She cried and cried, I couldn’t stop thinking about it later. The guy moved on, and so should she I told her. I told her it was past, it was long back.
She was looking for someone to understand her, someone to tell her that she is not a bad person. I hope she felt better after she went home. The question just stayed in my head, how people keep blaming themselves for things happened way in the past and cling to the bad memories more than the good ones.
Maybe after that day even I am thinking too much about the mistakes I did in the past, maybe I m blaming myself unnecessarily. To think about it now, were they really mistakes? No one tries to fail or mess things up on purpose. Each one of us wakes up in the morning, walks out in the world and does the best we can. Understand it is important to take responsibility of your mistakes, but it doesn’t mean you let your past grip you.
I want to ask you all; do u think she is wrong? Do you think she should spend all her life crying about a mistake she did? Do you think we should seize our mistakes and keep feeling guilty it happened?
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